2 weeks have past....

Week 2 ended with a bang... reliving my past... and one motto that I lived by in my workout in the past.... "Its all in the mind!!!" when you say you can, you do the most impossible things imaginable, when you say you can't, might as well give up right away, coz there is no way to make it... Ended the week doing the Singapore Passion Run, completed 15km in under 1 1/2 hrs. Workout this week was tougher, and left me breathless after most session. But the devil to my "unachievements" I would still blame it on my diet, and ultimately myself, to the weak mind. My diet is not really back on track. Still loading up more carb then I always take... not infusing enough protein. HOW HOW HOW??? 14weeks to go... must do something... if anyone have a good tip on dieting... please do share!!!

Back to the Singapore Passion Run, it is done in a bigger scale as compared to last year... and I am impressed with the turn out... The idea of going in waves for crowd control is great to be honest, and i really do suggest that other runs learn from them if they plan to start runs at the same times. I was in the second wave and started off with a comfortable pace. Less competitive compared to last year, well for the reason that I have not been a regular runner. Did a comfortable pace but push myself more for the last 5 km, was clocking 10km/hr till the last 5km, where I increase my pace a little. Still waiting for official time in. When I got back, was super early like i was flagged off by 6.45am and I got back at 8ish. so took a break and waited for Peili (oh yah btw, congraz to her for completing the entire race! You Go Girl!!!) and finish the last 5km with her... kinda like a cool down run for myself at the same time give her a little encouragement! Then met for breakfast with dear (thx dear for breakfast!!!) before head back for a little ZzzZZZ time... hehez Back to the organisers, feel that overall the run was a success, one of the better and more satisfied runs I have done thus far, everything was well planned... Having said so... I must comment something about the waterpoint thou... I guess a big part is because 100 Plus was a sponsor, which explains that only 2 stations was given water while the rest was 100 Plus. Guess its heaven for some, but I am sure not fancy of that idea, yes, 100 Plus do hydrate you good, but no matter what its sweet, leaving you feeling thirsty and really needing water... and the gas-y-ness really makes its harder to drink when u are already catching you breath desperately... My recommendation, for any of the organizer of the event, maybe you can half the stations? meaning at each water point... gives a selection of water and 100 plus (like what they did in stand chart marathon, or even mix 100 plus with water, so that it dilutes the 100 plus, giving pple the benefit of the minerals, hydrate, and take away the gas making it easier to consume. Something to consider lah.... hehez...

Since I am on the topic of running, thought I share some of my running tips that I have learn. Disclaimer: this is based on my own understanding of my body condition and type and results might vary on individual... so yeah... hehe... Well, basically there is 2 kinda of runners I would classify people under, the fore-footers and the heel runners. meaning running on the balls of the feet (which is more me) and running with their heels first. As fore footers, its very straining on the calves muscles so be sure to strengthen on them, and heelers its more on the thigh and hamstrings. For myself, in order to go the distance, I switch between 2 style of running, starting with my fore-foot then gradually ending with heel and last sprints with fore-foot again, this way is allow muscles to "rest" and involves your entire lower body including ur butt (believe it or not) so thats a little tip i do during runs, try it...

Hmm... enough about runs... hehez... kinda getting the momentum back... so will increase such activities back in my regimes, probably after my last assignment which I am indeed struggling to complete. Here is for week 3's regime

RESISTANCE TRAINING

A1: Band Squat
A2: Band Press (one foot forward, one foot back)

B1: Stationary Lunges (with bands)
B2: Standing Band Row (one foot forward, one foot back)

C1: Standing Shoulder Press with bands
C2: Bicep Curl with bands

D1: Standing Rotations
D2: Hip Thrusts

Aim for 12-15 reps for each one.






The 3rd Week Of My 16 Week Journey To Six Pack Abs - March 5 - video powered by Metacafe

First time I see Simon standing ovation for a competition...

This girl takes on huge songs and nail them well man!!!!

Its a FRIDAY!!!

Woohoo... its yet another weekend!!! and for all those fellow shopperholics out there.... Hugo Boss is going into further reduction sale... thou i doubt the price is going to be any much less (for commoners like myself that is) but I am sure its a steal compared to its original retail price. and and... breath.... GUCCI sale starts!!! woo... same as G-star Raw... so happy shopping people... hahaha I am not going crazy as I am yes once again Broke... Time in exchange for money... oh well... I will have my chance in the future... you can bet on it... hehehe its window shopping for now... and if I have the time that is... hehehz...

Oh another good news.... after so many years... (or like forever) Singapore Airline Boys are finally getting the limelight. (its about time) Read in the papers today they are finally standardizing their uniform to smart navy blue... SAY BYE TO THE UGLY BLUE-ISH GREY UNIFORM~!~!~! . This will take effect from 30th June and the "ranks" will be differentiated by the colour of their ties now (blue for newbies to purple for the most seniors). So many years their focus have been on the girls, its high time the guys get some privileges. Talking about the girls, alot of discussion have been going on about the standard of the so called Singapore Girls. Many claimed that the QC standard of SIA have drop plenty compared to the yester-years, are they so desperately understaff? or are pretty girls are just realising the fact that they are too smart to be working as a "high class waitress" (what commoners labels stewardess)? Feedback from within even says that the recruitment nowadays are just filling up the valencies and looks ain't that important anymore? Then again looking it from another point of view, is SIA just being less discriminating to not so looking individual and help "fulfill" their childhood dreams at the expense of Singapore Girls strong reputation? Seriously... there is more to see I guess.. But from where I stand, being a Singapore Girl/Boy have greatly lost it value.... sadly...

Now back to my workout... last day of week 2 regime.... verdict, tougher then last week... due to the sudden explosive power required for jump squats and lunges... but the ultimate effective-ness to the workout would still got to the time. supersets with one mine break is an absolute killer. I finish each session at about 30 mins and it feels like I have run for at least an hour. The difficulty to catch my breath part is a killer... But whatever it is... its complete and looking forward to next week... This weekend is dragonboat and my passion run on sunday which will cover 15km, my first running event for the year. and honestly, I have not cover such distance ever since last stand chart... so my goal is to not stop... and complete the race...

Since i foresee my weekend to be packed. Took my break yesterday and caught the LOTR concert at the esplanade. I think it was not bad for a local band, a certain level of professionalism was there... so the concert was overall enjoyable. Together with the visual it sure brings alot of effect from the three movies... Great music with great company = wonderful night... Will share photos once i get them...

Thats all I have for now... plenty to rush for my final assignment and procrastination is really getting the better of me on it... as progress is running low... but moving along, thou slowly.... but i guess is a study thing that I have inculcated from poly, love the last min mad rush so hopefully will get a better effect over the weekend....

Have a wonderful weekend ahead everyone... cheers!!!

Was Tagged by Azre....

Rules:
People who have been tagged must write their answers on their blogs and replace any question that they dislike with a new question formulated by themselves.Tag 8 people to do this quiz & those who are tagged cant refuse. These people must state who they were tagged by and cannot tag the person who they were tagged by.

———-
#1. If your lover betrayed you, what will your reaction be?
hmm... I guess I will never know... but if ever such day exist... I will walk away...

#2. If you can have a dream to come true, what would it be?
I know this sounds really cliche.... but to rid the world of all deadly diseases

#3. What will your dream wedding be like?
Just the 2 of us in a remote part of the world

#4. Are you confused as to what lies ahead of you?
It will have to depends on the aspect of which path u are referring to... some are clear, while some are foggy at the moment.

#5. What’s your ideal lover like?
Fun loving, Smart, someone i can talk to like my best fren, Understanding, and a sense of humor... (not too much i hope)

#6. Which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone?
when both happens simultaneously, believe or not... it's hardly ever equal from both ends.

#7. What do you see yourself as?
Someone that can make it big so as long as i find the courage to take the first step into things.

#8. If the person you secretly like is already attached, what would you do?
Another cliche answer... if she is happy I am happy...

#9. Is there anything that has made you unhappy these days?
Probably just my diet... but its getting back on track... and the endless assignment, (or rather, the procrastination of starting.)

#10. If you had a choice, what kind of family you want to be born into?
No complain of my current.

#11. Is being tagged fun?
Its not... honestly but seeing i can tag others and pissed other off with it... y not (hahaha kidding...) I am fine as long its not one of those chain mail that curse ur family and what not

#12. How do you see yourself in ten years time?
Successful, and living aboard

#13. Who are currently the most important people to you?
Parents, My dearest, and all my frens around

#14. What kind of person do you think the person who tagged you is?
Azre... loves anything branded... goes quiet in the middle of conversation when special "someones" walk pass. Enjoy impersonating Adrianna LIMOU!!!! hahahaha

#15. Would you rather be single and rich or married but poor?
Neither...

#16. What’s the first thing you do every morning?
Stoning and pondering why am i up... hahaha

#17. Would you give all in a relationship?
Yes

#18. Do you live to love, live to hate or live for the sake of living?
hmm... i live for myself... for love, for hate, for the sake of living... go figure... hahaha

#19. What type of friends do you like?
True-ness...

#20. What type of friends do you dislike?

Dislike is not harsh a word... like less maybe, if i dislike them, why would i befriend them in the first place? DUH!!!

—

Attention To:

Sherine (something for u to update), Peili, Amelia, Joyce, Karen, Nasser, Trisa, Wai Leng

Nah! You guys are so selected. Get to work ya alll!

Wet mid week of week 2

The shower have been on and off since noon, hehe... at least its not hot, but still praying hard that it will not rain so that i can work out tonight. Feeling aches from the workout i got from monday, its a good thing... so am enjoying it... Was asked if there was any visible signs of change... honestly... its hard for me to tell coz i see myself all day... hahah so yah... but as of now... i would say its still to early to say...

Muay Thai coach on reservist... so he wasn't there to coach us yesterday, feel strangely lost... hehehez... guess will only go down once he is back then... hehehez...skipping one week. We are also shifting... from cuppage starhub building to temple street, think its along boat quay, or clark quay, either one of them lah... Straight train... hopefully its better. heez.

Just recieved news that one of my course mate in poly is in stage 4 of lung cancer... think its initally throat and it spread to her lungs... Few months ago, one of my poly classmate lost her battle to brain cancer... This is indeed freaking me out... I hate all these news, but yet its serves as a constant reminder to me... on how fortunate I am till now... and i should be more thankful to life and to cherish every second of it. Thou i do not know her personally, but its still sad, no matter what we spent three years in the same course, in the same school. My blessing is for her, and hopefully she stays strong and win the battle over cancer...

Run in 4 days time... haven been training... but guess should be able to do it... just gonna take my time to enjoy my surrounding and a good run... a good guage for my AHM i guess... hehez....

Alright then i guess that all for now... hehez... Mid week... hang in there everyone... the weekends is just around the corner!!!

Cheers

Week 2 begins!!!

Have to constantly put this picture to remind myself of my current status. Was watching Super Sized me and honestly see a perfectly health body crashed due to fast food is super... i mean super SCARY lah... hehehez... For those that think they are fat... Please watch art central at 9pm tml, they show cases of the fastest youngest on the planet, I am talking about 14 year olds weighing up to 170kg!!! so yah... its not a form of consolation, but warning that if you dun do anything about your waistline apart from complaining that you are fat... THEN THIS MIGHT BE HOW YOU MIGHT END UP!!!! I really hope those kids can live long enough to lose those weight man...

Having said that, I regret to say that I a very disappointed with my dieting regime, the workout is fine, just that my diet isn't doing much justice to the input I generate in gym. One word to describe this weekend... SHIT!!! Super late nights, Super heavy dinners... Put my entire weeks work down the drain... Just hope not all is lost.... Going to persevere and determine to get the best out of these 16 weeks.

here is my week 2 regime. Wish me luck... I WILL SURVIVE!!!!

RESISTANCE TRAINING

A1: Dive Bomber Pushup
A2: Jump Squat

B1: Chin up or pull up
B2: Alternating Split Squat Jump

C1: Double Crunch
C2: Single Leg Plank Pose

1st week passed.... reflect

I have survive the 1st of the 16 weeks challenging.... regime wise, I would still say its acceptable, doing to my fittness level, trying to push it up a knot, but i guess its better the start from ground zero and slowly build it back up... I am not in the fitness level I was 6 months ago... which then I took about a year to build to that level... hehe....GROUND ZERO!!! REMEMBER RYAN!!!!

Lets do a recap.... been doing the regime I posted at the begining of the week, my verdict, seems easy when you are not doing it... hahaha Thou its all body weight workout... it takes the breath out of you with the supersets... as for cardio intervals, doing Muay Thai on tues, thurs I did my runs, and tml there will be dragonboat. This is pretty much how things will be... but the workout is fun, you just have to push yourself a little... The guy that is doing it is a bootcamp instructor... so that explains his determination, for me, I just need to prove it does not need a fitness instructor to show you that its only possible for them... 15 more weeks... and for all those who is joining me on my journey... will post my weekly regime here (or rather his 16 week regime here) and maybe we can work our way to a 6 packs together man... hehehe

Just make a pact with a secondary school friend, Chee Yong, who is entering into FUN ISLAND coming thursday to protect the nation. His mission is to lose at least 20kg in a span of 4 months, if you break it down its 5 kg a month about 1.2 kg a week. Not an impossible task since you are in tekong... jia you bro... his mission for me is to be able to bench 25kg each side, with reps of 12, honestly not so strong, but for him I will try my best...

For all those "supporter" I thank you... and do keep you words of encouragements coming.. hahah (suddenly i sound like N*F asking for donation, hehe you know... Please dial...1900..... hahaha)

Will post my coming week regime on sunday... hehe my rest day... hehehez Have a run next weekend, so probably go collect my race pack on sunday. Its the Singapore Passion Run. 15 km run which honestly I haven't train AT ALL!!!! but after the few rounds of running, can feel my stamina slowly picking up, (for short distance, not sure for long) so the key t the run will to survive the 15km without stopping. that will already be an achievement.

Reflection, think I am not much of a guy.... dun get me wrong, dun refer to that I am turning gay, thou there is nothing wrong being one and not discriminating. Think I have been a Mr. Nice Guy for too long, really, so much so that I am losing any part of a MCP in me... its not neccessary a bad thing (to many girls might think) but its not exactly a good thing either. But will have to sort it out alone... this is not something pple can help i guess.... But lesson learn... reflected and will improve... I AM GROWING STRONGER!~!~!~

Have a great weekend peepz...

Stiff neck... OMG!!!

Today's session for muay thai was good, and its a clear sign of my weaken stamina... really really really really need to do something about it... Nevertheless its a good session. The crowd is getting really big nowadays, maybe its due to this sudden Contender Asia craze. We are looking at close to 30 student now as compared to then when we have less then 10. So crunches and squats and all are really crazy... Our style is like we have everyone to form a circle and we go around with each one counting a certain amount... so for example, crunches, each one count 10... so we go around, we did close to 300 crunches man... HAHAHAHA

I have a long journey ahead of me.... can say the greatest obstacle for me now is still my diet, time off for the regime can still be done. But diet wise... still working towards 6 smaller meals a day. but will work on it...

Yawnz.... super tired... will go put some oilment and head of to bed... tml new day... new mission!!!

Why didn't she come to Singapore

Heard she had a concert in KL recently... WHY didn't she come.... Hello Esplande?? Hello Sistic? hahaha can invite her please!!! hehez.. she is awesome lah!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jnXNt4fJqj4

check out the link to find out who I am talking about... and yes... I am totally in love with this song!!!!!

It starts today...

This was me last year (photo on top), training for marathon, and this is me now...(photo on bottom) just look at the difference man... Then I was a gym freak, gym was practically my 2nd life, and with the monthly running event, I was literally packed with workout activities, and even when there is no event, I run alot... Ever since after Stand Chart marathon last year, I slacked and in the span of 6 months, I have gain 4 kg and changed from what I look then to what I look like now... I would have look much worse then now if I have not already start to gym and all again. Thats for sure.... and considering how I looked in the past (like really really long time ago) some might think its still not that bad. However, I should not compare to that time already as that chapter of my life has already past. Its time for me to take my body up another level, to a level I have yet attain in my life. yes I want to see my packs... I got so close and one slip and i got myself starting from ground zero again. But I am going to do something about it, and my journey starts today.

Rather then my regime in the past, which got be labelled as gym freak, where life revolve around gym, I am taking on a different approach, on working hard, but working smart too this time around... I have a chance to stumble upon this webby on a success story, and will give his workout a try... In 16 weeks he managed to get 6 packs, and together was alot of success stories, but mostly found from the other part of the world (meaning the states). I would like to prove to myself and everyone that, its possible to do so in Asia too... Will share his weekly regime here for those who are motivated to lost some weight and allow ur abs to see light. For those who are still not convince... No forcing you, coz honestly, there is no point, some people follow from the motto "Do nothing and be happy, rather then doing something they are not" so yeah, its you life... you choose...

Alright, enough trash talk, here is the regime for my first week, then on, I will share me feelings for every week, and hopefully show picture of my improvement, am targeting by week 8 and of course 16 which is the end!!! Wish me luck people...

Week One - M, W, F
Workout Routine:

Monday: Resistance Training (from the fitness video journal)
Tuesday: Interval Training: Cardio
Wednesday: Resistance Training (from the fitness video journal)
Thursday: Interval Training: Cardio
Friday: Resistance Training (from the fitness video journal)
Saturday: Interval Training: Cardio
Sunday: Rest

Online Videos by Veoh.com

Its all in the mind...

Was watching Tyra Bank's talk show this morning, normally not a big fan of her show, just that the topic of the day caught my eyes. "Fashion Freaks!" I would call it... Well, the topic of the day talks about people obsess with branded goods, and when I say branded I mean branded, from LV, to Polo Ralph, to Burberry, and what not...

But the point highlighted is how such goods "poisons" her guest's minds... and she actually made them realise how so and how bad they are being "poisoned" and how dependent they are on these goods. There is this girl, all it took was a fashion label, and it was able to change her way she look at life, and you can literally see the change in her, SUPER DRASTIC LAH!!!! she was made to go out in 2 set of different close. One and authentic Prada dress and the other a cheap dress that look expensive. The difference was they swap the label. So lets call the Prada dress that has its label swap "A" and the fake prada "B". So when this girl wore A, she felt super inferior, like she is out of place, no one was looking at her, no one was noticing her, she found it hard to talk to people, she shouldn't be dress this way in a posh hotel, all because she didn't know that the dress was actually PRADA!!!! then when she wore B, CHANGED!!! the confidence and all was back, she talk to people, walk with her head up straight... feels all good about herself. Weird isn't it.

Then there is this mother that will not dress her kids in nothing less then branded, and not kids branded, ADULT brands like polo ralph and hermes and stuff like that. (OMG!!!!) on the average she spends 1000 on her kids MONTHLY!!!! THIS IS MADNESS!!!! So Tyra tried the same thing on her, showing her a series of kids wear, even go to the extent of getting someone to act as a designer to describe the clothes, and she was hooked and say it was her kind... little that she knew all the clothes range was from Kmart and the designer was someone from the audience!!! OMG!!!

If you think that is extreme, people even go to the extend to make water branded, no you are not hearing wrongly, WATER, H2O, the thing flowing out from you tap. Some people in America actually spends money buying bottled water... CRAZY LAH!!!

I am not saying that I do not go for brands, just not that obsess with it. Brand do play a part of my buying decision, but honestly will not be the first thing that make me buy an item. If there is really going to be ranking. Here is how it will go:-

This is in terms of clothes and things we put on myself.
1) Comfort
2) Looks/Appearance
3) Workmanship
4) Brand

and the list goes on... yes brand no doubtingly will put into peoples brain how reliable it is. But honestly it does not play such a big role in my part unless there is a "Pulling" factor. Like a good steal of such like something going for hundreds and I am getting it for 30 bucks or something. yes, but I will feel so much better if the thing is comfy, good quality and workmanship at the same time price is good... the achievement is so much higher man...

Perception is always playing tricks in everyone's mind, even in my own, but one honestly advise. Try looking at the thing you feel like buying from many angle, do not just get blinded by the brand, look out for details and sometime you can get something better from a departmental store then from a boutique.

In her show, she invited a couple of authors who wrote about fashion today and about branded goods losing its luxury. Honestly, I do agree that luxury has lost it touch, and I do not blame them as they have to to meet demands, but if you think of it... do they have to? or they want to? You are getting big designer brands and nowadays it is made in China, Thailand, etc. What happened to those made in Germany, or Italy things already. Please do not misunderstand, but I have no issue with goods made in China or Thailand, or are particularly fancy of things from Germany and Italy, my point is, since those goods are originally from there, why aren't they made there anymore? Cheaper manufacturing but selling at 'original' prices? think about it. Luxury have really lost it touch.

Human perception is a really scary thing... but its what keeps big companies going, and millionaires' bank full. preying on needs, desire of human... And as intelligent as we think we all are... Think again... even the smartest have their foolish moments...

CHAMPIONZ!!!!

MAN U claims double!!! thrilling match, credit to chelsea too... having fought the battle all the way to the end.... one of the better EPL clashing ever. First half chelsea must thought they are playing against the 11 man they played in EPL... its really wrong as you can tell that they got a shock on how well man u is when they are full strenght, so 2nd half they come back, both team miss numerous oppotunities, with both teams settling with just a goal from the first half; Ronaldo's fantastic header goal and Lampard goal from a defensive error of man u. It dragged into extra time and both team seem significantly tired already. Then it was down to penalty... Man U seems like a goner with their line up of penalty takers, especially when their top scorer, Ronaldo was denied by Chez. But things took a turn when John Terry, the person that made Chelsea dream come alive and pretty much save them the spot in the final, hit the post. Heavy price to pay... The moment of truth was out when Van de Sar denied Anelka... Fantastic... Man U have made Chelsea 2nd 2 times in a row, definately a tough thing to swallow. Terry could not keep himself together after... who could... but overall, fantastic match, and a true champion league final at its best.

Another would be America Idol, David Cook is crowned the new American Idol!!! ROCK ONLI!!! hehez... both are good (that is according to my mum, but she was rooting for the youngster, as she claim he did very well and got super good comment from Simon) Oh well, I am sure both did very well, with Cook only winning by a mere 12,000 votes, a very little amount considering the number of votes have been casted (MILLIONS LAH!!!!) Congraz... and let see how things goes for him lah... Honestly there isn't many that really succeed, the only would still be Kelly Clarkson.

Was looking at training from wrestler yesterday over in youtube...and cannot help but feel that this wrestler, or rather ex-wrestler, Brock Lenar, is a true athelete man... for a man his size, he moves really really fast... scary fast... give me lots of motivation... but of course not to get to his size... just having part of his strenght and stamina and physics I will be POWERFUL LIAO LAH!!! but look at the workout he goes through and u understand how he gets to what he is man... ENJOY!!!! its an orgasmic experience...

A promise to keep... boring blog ahead...

My weight is official, itchy today and stepped on the weighing scale. I AM 77kg, from my lowest at 73kg, that is alot... HAHA!!! One consolation would be a comment from yao guo... said i look buffer... haha...so hopefully I am gaining muscle mass... hehez

Been promising myself to workout for close to a month now... and honestly thou progress is slow, I am conditioning my body to pick up rather well I must say. Anyway I have a target to reach, 25 September 2008 is the date. A few targets to reach, as follows

1) Toner body (hopefully my abs will show)
2) Be lighter, fitter, stronger
3) Better fitting in clothes (being a fashionista, thats a must)
4) Bring out the confidence in me
5) long term goal, Maybe appear in magazine again? pehaps... hehez

This is going to be an all out experience, and my blog will now features on all the moment till 25th september, the time frame is 16 week. In this 16 weeks I will share all the thrills and spills, the ups and down to my workout regime as well as a record of my diet plan. As well as photos sharing. meanwhile, here is what I look now... present moment... just taken 5 mins ago. Not a pretty sight and certainly not for the faint hearted... hahaha

Scary eh... hopefully in 16 weeks time things will change... alright thats for now then... hopefully my journey can inspire those that wanna lose weight too... if not... Please just show me support ba... hehez... Cheers pple!!!

There is always rainbow after a shower

To everyone who is worried over my last post... I AM FINE!!!! guess its just a sudden mixed of emotions and all I guess. But thx thx...

The fear inside...

I hate being in this constant state of contradiction, feeling lost, having to assume things... I HATE IT!!! Maybe I am just being too weak, or maybe I just care too much, overly sensitive to my surrounding... Don't ask me why, I am like that... and boy do I hate it man....

I am tired... really tired... cause I don't understand, and I do not enjoy leaving a question hanging... I like it solved... coz its bothers me... and no one wants a problem during a weekend when they already have plenty over the weekdays... TRUST ME!!!

Bloody Monitor keep giving me problem, think I have to change it soon before it cause my cpu to crash.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!! i feel like just screaming like that now man... Thank god for Muay Thai, truely the only things to vent whatever I have within. I think if there is not muay thai, I will be in Hougang Chalet already.

Giving everyone everything and end up with nothing for yourself... should I be so selfish... can't i deserve some too??? Someone tell me??? I am afraid, to do things I want to do... or at least think I want to do... I donno why... but it seems that way... TOTAL SIAN-NESS!!!

Self Reflection...

A series of events lately have really caused me to sit down to reflect on me, Ryan Koh, as a person. This is no bragging session, neither a self pity or whatever you want to see it session. But I really feel that its healthy for everyone to do this once in awhile... To truely understand yourself from ground zero.

Hmm... Honestly, I say I try to be there for everyone of my friends.. those needing a listening ear, a word of advise, a shoulder to rest on and all... So much so I wonder at time, What is the base to the advise I am giving? What made me so special to be advising people. At times I get so overly carried away I will think, Why complicate such a simple matter and broad over it... GET OVER IT ALREADY... but reflecting on that now... its not as simple as it seems.... Coz like they will say, things are often easier said then done. Many a times, maybe me being overly sensitive again, I feel that me extending my aid seem to others as my form of showing off. In what expect I really donno, maybe i am just being to self centered, and feel that all the attention is at me all the time... You know I am not sure if you feel this... but I do all the time... I feel that I am judged every second of the day (except when I am alone, and even then, u do judge urself too... when u look into the mirror). I voice this out and many people just thinks I am being paranoid, maybe I am, but i cannot help it. Serene mention about brain conditioning, and again, I feel that its something easier said then done, if everyone is capable of doing so, psychiatrists around the world will be out of job.

I am sure many of you out there have experienced moment where what u say and what u think is contridicting... Like you tell urself "I can do this" but in your mind you are going "there is no way" yet u try to convince urself you can... Its a kinda conditioning, but I honestly say... it doesn't really work on me... coz many a times, these things that happens to me is a reflecting of my past. so much so it as already turn to a habit, a reflex, something that will come to you naturally when something else happens. Hard to change, but never impossible... working hard on it...

I am into a new phase of workout and trying to 'regain yesterday's glory' and ultimate aims... started my cycle of supplements again. and already catching up on my runs and all... thou the distance remains... still trying to work on my stamina. First run of the year starts in less then a month away. Singapore Passion run, a 15km run this year... ECP, my most hated running round when comes to running event coz its a round about run so everything u see its pretty much the same... SIAN....

There is plenty more to reflect... but I cannot really put them in words right now... so i will leave it as it is now... and maybe a part 2 or what some other day then... Cheers, and have a great weekend ahead everyone!!!!

Rainy day... woo hoo

The day started off rainy... and have not seen the sun all day... not sure will get to see it today lah... Thank god for the plaster (yao gao bu in chinese), have a bad case of stiff neck after yesterday's session of muay thai... guess I really have to strengthen muscles there. Apart from that, yesterday training was pretty fun, a huge group and the cooling down regime was a killer. SHIOK ARH!!! heehz

Learn a very interesting phrase from TV today, or Rui En for that matter. She says, "You can be everything to everyone, but end up being nothing to yourself." I feels its really meaningful and reflects alot on myself. Many a times, I have been so focus in making everyone around me happy, that i neglected myself. Its not wrong to be selfish and think of urself at times... You too need time off you know... hehez

Okok enough on that... Working on heaps of assingment once again as the term is coming to an end... This sem seems so much longer. but at least things are not as packed compared to that last... guess thats y I feel its more of a breeze... but having say that... should try to procrastinate less and get things done and over with... alright then... lunch time... the smell of food is really making me super hungry lah... hehez... Cheers peepz!!!

Yet another hot day...

Mother Nature is finally angry with human taking everything for granted... and its fighting back in every aspect. Earthquakes, Hurricanes, Tornadoes, you name it... and its getting bigger than every. and soon to come, a volcano eruption in New Zealand I think. She seems to be punishing those that are discontented with life... Places like Indonesia, Myanmar, and now China. Indonesia we know its the constant riots and stuff. For Myanmar was also a strike of some sort, and China is the war with Tibet that have sparks many reaction all over the world. With so many incident, it really makes one wonder if Olympics is going to take place this year. Will China place a mark in history, for first and last time hosting such major event? I really wonder... China is undoubtingly going to be a major power one day... but will I live to see it... I ponder...

Today its yet another hot day... this heatwave is frying Singapore man... its like being in a microwave (not that I have physically been in one... but SAME DIFFERENCE) Looking forward to Muay Thai tonight... the sweat and all... woo hoo... Got my supplements this morning... will start the cycle tomorrow on I think. Its really time to make amendments to my sleeping habits, eating habits, exercise regime and time management on a whole. Have plenty to change. Slow and steady is the key.

Hmm... nothing much to share about this bright sunny tuesday afternoon. Except that its HOT HOT HOT!!! haha... oh well looking forward to a packed weekend... so have to see lah.. hehez... Money spending again OMG!!!! have to stay with bread for the week then...

Alright have a great day ahead pple... cheers

oppz. I did it again...

Hello peepz.... been a busy past few days... with many many things, assignments, outings, you name it... but alot involves money, and sadly there ain't much left...OMG FINANCIAL SLOW DOWN COME SO SOON!!!! for me at least... really need to tighten my belt from a waist of 32 to 28 or 26 liao... hahaha (oppz i disclosed my waist size...)

Anyway, to all the mothers out there... HAPPY BELATED MOTHER'S DAY!!! Brought my mum to sakea today. Due to the rising food prices, sakea have also increase in their price per plate... its no long 1.99 per plate people, its 2.29 per plate liao... red plate is not 5.99 liao... CRAZY ARH!!! but since it was for a special occasion then nvm lah... PPLE WATCH OUT ARH!!! hehez sakea is no longer cheap liao...

This weekend has been pretty packed... Friday, went to JB with Herbert and Terence, bert needs to top up on some office wear for his new job with ANA, ALL THE BEST YAH BRO!!! hehez... managed to get quite a few nice ones... I got myself a couple too and pants... hehez... ended up i got the entire set when he only got tops... but nevertheless, it was good "harvest". The rush back was crazy... we wanted to make it for Marie Digley debut performance at Velvet Underground for her promo album. Was late by 1/2 hour but still managed to get in. She can sing, but honestly, to offence to her fans out there. Its forgettable, if she is not yet discovered by big organsation, then this might jolly well be her first and last album. But she is drop dead chio lah... for that matter. As we were leaving after that... get to meet her face to face, too bad I didn't bring a camera (due to the rush) if not I will definately take a pic with her. After which, went to Wine Connection down at Robertson Quay (which bert kept pestering to go... hahaha and get intro to those SIA ger frens of ours... hahaha) for a little wine, and chat before heading home in night-rider.... send Serene home first of course... hehez.. couldn't let her go back herself at that hour can't I? hahaha

Saturday, went dragonboating with Serene, her company team and she ask me to try out. Was at Bedok reservoir, was a neat sessions, but through that session have really experience the importance of the basics (something i have neglected in the pass) I would say I did a good session with them, and for a first time meeting up with them... they are really friendly people... Evening went for a walk in town with Serene (after showering at home and all of course...hee) and yeah... pretty much summed up the day

Sunday, assignment block the entire day... progress and tension is building up...as my procrastinating nature have once again put these stress mode back on me... working slow but steadily to the finishing line... hopefully i won't do so bad... That about it for now... the week ahead, really not expecting anything big... But really want to get all the assignments done once and for all... so that i can chill already...

Have a great week ahead everyone!!! Cheers!

Bloody Mess!!!

Don't worry, nothing happened to me... just refering to my visit to the dentist this morning... My mouth is FILTHY man!!! thats what the dentist said... so plenty of scrapping and polishing... now my mouth feels really sore as he used alot of strenght scrapping all the dirt of my teeth, so much so at some point I felt as thou my 2 front teeth is coming out....

Everytime i rinse my mouth, its like i am vomiting blood man... woo hoo scary... hehez... The dentist had to give me some kinda mouthwash to gaggle to stop the bleeding. Now have problem chewing too hard... very sore... but for the better of my mouth... i will be ok... hehez... Lesson learnt: visit you dentist once a year (thou some said once every 6 mths.)

Enough on my gross ordeal. Past 2 days have been pretty alright, manage to do a decent workout thou still struggling to keep my diet in place, All day i think about food food... when I have having lunch I will be thinking about what to snack after... IT IS BAD!!! try very hard to keep in controlled.

My monitor at home is giving me problem once again. Hope it does not affect my cpu... at least wait till i have enough money to get a new piece lah. hehez...

School's later, before that will hit the gym first... trying to keep this regime alive... I dun want my efforts to go to waste... The runs are nearing and I haven't been training my runs as yet... time to change my schedule abit here and there.

Jia you!!!

Wassup with that!!!

I am sorry if I have given people attitude lately... I really haven't been myself lately... So very very sorry If I did offend anyone, or pissed anyone that have crossed my path.

The damn weather hasn't been helpful recently. I know its no point whining (and I dun like to do so) about something that I cannot change. ARRRRGGGHHH!!!! That feels so much better. Everything in school is moving along pretty smoothly, too smoothly actually, so much so I feel like I am slacking. Is it wrong?

I had this feeling, a feeling even I cannot explain... I thought its gone already... but it just keep on coming and coming? Mini depression? I donno, but really hope not... haiz... What is this feeling... why am I feeling like that? I really donno... haiz... When can i face up to it... the unknown... I ALSO DONNO!!! How do you face up to something you don't even know? I wonder at myself sometimes...

Today, the sky looks hopeful to rain, but the sky seem really dark but not a single drop of rain in sight... Looking at it the bright side... at least its not very hot... hahaha have class tonight, do doubt I will leave office too late, wan to hit a workout in the gym first.

Easily emo lately... Finding back the old me... at least... trying to find...

The Real Me....

Lately emotions have been running about myself... and I start to realize that the roots of many problems begins with me... yes a reaction to things always comes from an action first... but many a times i feel that such action are cause by me in the first place. So I actually get back what I caused in the first place... Confused... you are not alone....

Everything have been about me... at least thats is what the inner me have been tell me... when something goes wrong, Me, when someone is upset, Me, when something screws up... ME. ME, ME, ME... I donno what have turn me this way... but honestly its not doing me any good. I feel distant from most of my classmates, self inflicted I can tell, but i really don't know what I can do about it. I lost words to talk to them. So I stay silent, but many a times I feel they think there is something wrong with me... I DO!!!! I dare not face it I guess.

The feeling I have is really affecting me and those that are near me... Its kinda repelling anyone from getting too close with me... and those that hasn't gave up on me... i fear might soon will...

I do wan to talk, I was the one that say to talk in the first place... Communication solve many problems... but whenever a problem arise... where does my voice box goes? It was brought up yesterday. "Thought you want to talk, why must I always ask before you are willing to talk? Why you talk during happy times and when situation arises you keep dumb..." Everything has been processing in me... I also want to find the answer. I guess i am afraid to talk... worried that whatever said might bring about more understanding, but it seems like my silence weren't at all helpful too... What can I do?

I don't want to make myself sound like a victim here.... But blogging is indeed my best channel to let everything out. I am not as confident as all you guys out there think I am... thou I would say I can be pretty good an actor, or like the King would say... I am a pretender. I admit I am not smart, neither and I stupid, but I dare admit I have an honest heart... a simple simple heart, and really fragile for a guy's one to be honest. Everything affects me easily, I tear pretty easily, nothing shameful about that I guess, I enjoy peace, I enjoy having time to myself, doing my own things, and yet factors pushes me to want to push myself all the time, I want to lead a better live. I have no issues about money (yet) and what I earn currently is self sufficient. I am happy with my current state now, but at times, I feel that I really need to go out to earn big money, to satisfy other need, I want people to look up to me... I want to be successful in life. Isn't that what everyone wants in live?

Whenever I "whine" about things like that in life, many would ask me, what is success in life? Honestly, I haven't a clue, I was even posted that question in one of my interview... At that point, I was struck dumb... I really donno what is success in life... at least in my own definition. Always in my lowest point, I look back in the past, things that have given me so much happiness, all my achievements, my biggest so far would be my weight loss. I envied those days where nothing seems to be able to stop me... No fear, just try, fail, just try again... and when everything get tough, the inner me will just keep pushing me... forcing me to work extra hard.... Making goals were so much easier then as my drives makes everything achievable. Procrastination was never an option, whenever I wanted to run, I will pick up the runners and just go. Nowadays, I will look out, see a hot day, and just hit the showers. Where is my drive... have I let it die away? why am I full of excuses lately, why can I just admit that I haven't have it in me no more... Loser are not shameful, quitters are... I am trying my best not to get to that stage.

I used to be able to stand up... and just go... now I am desperately in-need of a hand, a strong one... someone to drill me back, get my ass of the couch and back on running tracks... is there someone out there to help me? Please Help.... Be it gym buddy, or running buddy, or a devil coach, you are all welcome...

I am a simple guy, nothing special about me at all, the earth will still spins even if I am died, and live will not wait for me so I am really hoping to stand up... will you help me???

HAHA got tagged by Sherine, first on the list is ME!!!! Thx leh... hahaha
1) Are your parents married or divorced? - Married to each other... DUH!!!!
2) Are you a vegetarian? - Tried... I LOVE MEAT!!!!
3) Do you believe in Heaven? - Better then burning in HELL. HAHAH
4) Have you ever come close to dying? - A couple of times...
5) What jewelery do you wear daily? - Bling Blings...
6) Favorite time of day? - All day!!!
7) Do you eat the stems of broccoli? - Bring in the brollis man!
8) What is your hair styling agent? - Ahh..... can give you Gastby!~!~!~!`
9) Ever have any surgery? you should ask which part have i not undergone surgery...hahaha oppz.
10) Do you color your hair? - Yes.... Black is so yesterday!!
11) What do you wear to bed? - singlet and boxers... comfy...
12) Have you ever done anything illegal? - Hmm... cannot recall (sinister smile...)
13) Can you roll your tongue? - Like DUH!!!
14) Electric razor or blade? - BLADE!!!!
15) What kind of shoes usually? - Runners and sneakers
16) Do you condone Abortions? - Yes I do!!! everyone deserve a chance to see the world.
17) What is your Hair color? - Brown?
18) Future child's name? Boy or girl? - child? what child... no plans as yet... haha
19) Do you snore? - I my best not too...
20) If you could go anywhere in the world where would it be? - USA!
21) Do you sleep with stuffed animals? Nope...
22) If you won the lottery, what would you do first? - really have to depends how much? hehe
23) Gold or platinum/white gold? - Show me the GOLD!!!
24) Hamburger or hot dog? Which one comes faster? - neither...
25) If you could only eat one food for the rest of your life, what would it be? - Chicken Rice
26) City, beach or country? - Country (Yee Har!!!)
27) What was the last thing you touched? - My brother the MOUSE!!! (beside the keyboard)
28) Where did you eat last? - Home (brekkie)
29) When's the last time you cried? - haven cried in ages, just tears...
30) Do you read blogs? - Yeah...
31) Would you ever go out dressed like the opposite sex? - Not really thou am sure i will look pretty stunning... hahaha
32) Ever been involved with the police? - Its all in the past now...
33) What's your favorite shampoo and soap? - anything that keeps me clean and smells good of course.
34) Do you talk in your sleep? - not that i know of
35) Ocean or pool? - Ocean (Surfs up dude!!!)
38) Window seat or aisle? - change from time to time, mood dependable
39) Ever met anyone famous? - yes... depends on how u define famous i guess...
40) Do you feel that you've had a truly successful life? - yes but more room to explore
41) Do you twirl your spaghetti or cut it? - Twirl
42) Ricki Lake or Oprah Winfrey? - Oprah Winfrey
43) Basketball or Football? - Football, Aussie Foodie!!!
44) How long do your showers last? - from 5mins to 25mins
45) Automatic or stick shift? - Stick shift man... hehez
46) Cake or ice cream? - no particular craving (till lately... )
47) Are you self-conscious? - VERY!!!! OVERLY sometimes if I might add.
48) Have you ever drank so much you threw up? - eh... quite a few time Gross!!!
49) Have you ever given money to a begger? - yeah...
50) Have you been in love? - Yesh..
51) Where do you wish you were? - Anywhere but here!!!
52) Do you wearing socks with your shoes? - yeah Hygiene man!!!
53) Have you ever ridden in an ambulance? - Yeah... once or twice...
54) Can you tango? - No... but would be fun to try...
55) Last gift you received? - words of encouragement
56) Last sport you played? - dragonboat... and i miss it terribly
57) Things you spend a lot of money on? - Mainly food... at times on shopping
58) Where do you live? - Serangoon
59) Where were you born? - KK Hospital baby!!!
60) Last wedding attended? - Ages... even i dun remember
63) Most hated food(s)? - Celery, Ladies finger and bitter gourd.
64) What's your favourite?- Having friends... never a down moments with them...
65) Can you sing?- I dun croak like a frog if thats what you mean... hahaha
66) Last person you instant messaged? Trisa... hehez
67) Last place you went on holiday? - Perth, WA
68) Favorite regular drink? - Water, tea, and BEER (not regular thou) heez...
69) Tag 5 friends: - hmm... Apel, Azre, Serene, Carol and erm.... Peili!!!
70) Current Song? - Can't you hear it from my blog??? hehe Enjoy

OH the HEAT.... I AM MELTING.......

The weather these few days have been really really really really bad... ITS SUPER DUPER HOT LAH!!!! for once I am complaining, coz the sun will BURN man... its been a long time since the sun have been this strong... Is the world goint to end really soon, coz the weather is sure showing signs of it... But well for now... PLEASE USE SUN SCREEN!!!! am going to get some later... hehez..

Its gonna be an all English Final for Champions league, Man U Vs Chelsea, the second clash after that defeat of Man U, going to be a revengeful night for Man U, and now with a stronger squard I am sure. Chelsea Vs Barcalona match was exciting man... Paul Scholes winning goal was a screamer... like the old Scholes I knew... but honestly, can tell that age is catching up on him... he is not as aggressive as in the past. Maybe because Roy Keane no longer around? Donoo... hehez...

The match between Liverpool and Chelsea was a good game as well... with both sides showing plenty of skills and determination. The penalty was really un-called for and liverpool was also obviously denied a penalty... Oh well... both teams played to their best... so NO REGRETS MAN!!!

Been a pretty slack week for me I have to say, why? coz I haven't really started working out as planned (OMG!!! I HATE PROCRASTINATING!!!) progress have been slow, but moving along steady. Will hopefully improve it next week...

OMG i am super late... shall write more some other time then... have a great weekend and Cheers peepz

Battle scars.... and talking FATS!!! ARGH!!!!

My limbs is decorated with many 50cents, 20 cents, 10 cents and 5 cents coins... hahaha wonder how I got such small bruise on my hand anyway... think it must be from the way i hold the pads ba...

Anyway yesterday's training was pretty fun, intense but not fulfilling as they did sparring, not enough cardio for me I guess... Will look into improving my stamina in the coming months as i prepare for 2 up coming runs, namely, Singapore Passion Run (15km) and the Shears Bridge Run (21km). I have to change my mentality and start training from scratch, haven't been running and have to stop thinking that since i have completed a marathon, what are these distance to me... IT IS DIFFERENT ALREADY!!!!

Have a survey over MINDEF later this afternoon, then will be heading off to school gym for a workout, which i missed on monday as I had no class. looking to work on my chest and my legs today... and maybe abit of my abs too...

I dread standing infront of the mirror now.... coz the fats around my tummy is talking to me... hehez... its gaining back fast on me... Not a good sign at all have to make it go away again!!!

There is this thing going around regarding having to wear seatbelts in mini bus following the death of a little boy... Singapore being such an advance and developed country... I really wonder why is it that time and time again, we only react to a problem when it happens. Oversea school locally can do so why not locals? And whats with increasing fare? fetching lesser student? so lesser earning? PLEASE LAH... what is the lifespan of seat belt, like it last all the way till the van is scrape lah... using this as an excuse to increase charges is simply ridiculous lor... But having the driver to pay all seems abit harsh as well... So solution would be our trusty government... SPONSOR PART OF IT PLEASE!!!! hehez... I mean our govt is very smart lah... if they sponsor, am sure they will make it a law, then catching anyone not doing so....AND FINE!!!! woohoo...earn it all back.. hehez... but nothing wrong about it I guess... since they offered to help, pple would just have to abide by the law. I feel the bit about driving lesser quite weird too.. I mean lets not talk about those big bus, we are looking at those mini vans... I thought there is no standing allowed in such van, so seats are basically the capacity. So whats with driving more or less... really don't understand...

Oh well thats what i have to say.... Pretty dumb to begin with, if they followed examples of United World Collage and Australian School of Singapore, then such tragedy will not happen in the first place. Singaporean, having lived in the comfort zone, under the protective arms of Singapore for so long, have taken everything for granted, that accidents will never happen to them, so precautions need not be taken... and solving problem when it come...well... some problem does not have a solution, stop taking the "learning from mistake" approach, rather, take a "prevention is better then cure" approach. it doesn't kill to be extra caution. This is one very good example... a lost of a very young life...

Fulfilling yet VERY SINFUL EVENING!!!! AM I THE ONE??? heez

Just home from a very sinful Mutabak supper with Serene and Herbert, what was suppose to be shared by the three of us, ended up having to try finish it by 2 if us (serene and I), eventually we didn't and am now feeling super bloated... so I thought of blogging to get my mind off the bloated-ness for the time being...

Before that, we went to support Louis Fong for the "Wei Wu Du Zun" aka "You are the one" Competition, tonights theme was "Sunshine Boys" (that would be me!!! haha acting like NONO that is... hahaha, an inside joke, only those that know me long enough would know... heez) Anyway, my man, M6 Hong Jing Peng, did a stunning show tonight, making the audience laugh have have a huge group of supporters behind him today... All was well and he was leading in every round... but the final result was the stunner as M7 came from behind to steal the win... Unbelievable, oh well sportmenship lah... I really think he did really well tonight... but as usual, I would guess the fumble is at the 45sec Q&A, M7 really impressed everyone with his answer with "I am the sun in the winter, abit of it is enough to bring warm to those around me" *clap clap clap* BUT I STILL SUPPORT MY MAN, M6 LOUIS FONG!!! PPLE PLEASE SUPPORT HIM!!! HEEZ.... (free advertising)

Well, Serene have different taste, she liked M5 as she found him adorable... hahah cute act and all... hehe, and M8, the to-die-for for every girls... But overall, I finally know how its done live... Its really different from watching at home... as really... many things ain't what it seems to be... HAHAHAHA....

Alright.... 5 months, tonight, my last sinful supper, I am determine to find my old diet back... so to all my friends out there... please help me along... I mean I am more then delighted to go out supper with u guys... just that I might just have a milo and watch you guys eat... if you don't mind. Cheers guys... NIGHTS TO ALL AND HAVE A GREAT WEEK AHEAD!!!!

Slow day...

Doing brainless admin work in office today... so boring so thought i steal a break and blog for awhile... Yawnz.... its always coming to working and doing such things the spurs me to look for a job elsewhere lah... hehez.. oh well... if not for the flexible hours... HAHAHA... tahan till better oppotunity comes by ba.

Today makes 7 years since she is gone... Time really flies... if she is around she would be? 25 years old? I was actually reminded... if not its honestly slipped of my mind... but once reminded, that very evening flash past my mind like it was only yesterday. The sound of the heart rate machine, the scenes at ICU... the feeling of being lost.. and honestly not believing as it all happened so quickly. Yes... today is the day my sister have left us....

Will not be going for class tonight, simply because i don't have to... Going to catch "you are the One" competition, supporting my fren M6, Louis Fong, Hong Jing Peng in mandarine. Just what to see whats going on live and while they go for commercial breaks... hehez... hope its gonna be fun...

Workout regime have yet to begin... for the simple reason that my day was packed... was thinking of going this morning, but thought of the rush from here to there, I gave up the tot, something i would not do it the past... guess my determination is not quite there yet... but all i know is I have a deadline to meet... and if i don't do anything about it... then nothing will happen... So Jia You ba!!!

All have been quiet today... Slow day... hoping it to pass faster....

Yet another Dragon Lost....*sob*

Splashed all over today's front page. Another dragonboater is lost. This time to a car accident, a taxi driver, obviously speeding to a certain extent. This time its one of the strong ladies from the Pink Paddlers, better known as the Team of Survivors of Breast Cancer. Its kinda sad to see such a thing happening as these people are all heroes in their own ways, able to conquer cancer is really an achievement in life many can't. Being able to stand up to it and face the world with it is even a harder thing to do... so its very sad to see such tragedy.

Those left behind have my deepest condolences, I understand how hard to lose a close one. No matter how harsh these words might sound, but life honestly goes on. Coz sooner or later, you will be reunited when your turn to cross over comes.

Enough on that sad story. Now for a segment called "PLACES YOU SHOULD AVOID". One place honestly would be Harry's @ CHIJMES. Was there to watch the big match with a bunch of my friends yesterday and the service was 'unbelievable'. We thought we got a good seat, at the couch with a 42" TV to ourselves and the aircon right above us. Sounds like nothing was going to spoil our time there right? WRONG!!! First, I guess being in a corner like that, its pretty un-noticable, so we took quite awhile to order our drinks. But the drinks came really quick so as we settled the bill for the drink, we ordered some wedges to go with the beer... First half went past and it never came... and I am sure its not the excitement of the game (coz its wasn't too exciting to start with) but we are feeling the heat and the aircon dun seem to be working. So as Dennes approach the counter to ask for our wedges, Serene ask the lady who served us our drink if there is something wrong with the ventilation, she simply say "No, i don't think so" and walked away doing her thing. Its like RUDE lah, i mean i am giving her the benefit of a doubt that she is suffering from some pregnancy illness or something. But the wedges is ridiculous. It didn't come even till the match ended. Honestly, it was like watching a soccer match in a sauna room, left the place with my t-shirt have soaked, and Dennes was also sweating despite being in a dry fit jersey... So much for airconditioning. I honestly would ask whoever that is planning to go there to reconsider as there is definately many other nicer branches around. But if you are looking for good service and a comfortable place to rest and relax, trust me... there won't be it... Despite having the money to have big screen tv and all, they could not afford to turn their aircon up just a little to comfort the crowd. Disappointing.

Thats all for yesterday's entry, and of course we had a beautiful evening after we left that dreadful place. Have a great Sunday everyone, whats left of it that is... Cheers

Doggie World

After so long, I went back to SPCA. No, I didn't give any dog up for adoption. In fact, I witnessed what I thought I would never see - PEDIGREE dogs given up by their owners!!!! Given up would be too kind; abandon is a better word I'd say. It's sad to see so many of them from Huskies to Boxers, German Shepherd to noisy Jack Russells. Where happen to those day where X-breed were most of the population, not that they aren't there now... its just now more pure breeds are ruling that place... ITS WRONG!!!!

Got to know a couple of goodie doggies.... Namely Alex (2 years old German Shepherd) and Carrot (not the veggie, but a 1 1/2 years old boxer) both pretty little thing... and huge dog which needs alot of running space... So its kinda sad seeing them walking around in circles in what seems like the space of the toilet on a plane. Alex in particular brings much feelings. The look on his face is priceless. According to those pple that found him. He has just been abandon (curse you who ever you are!!!), he looked like he is super lost... and will only be there for a short while before his owner comes claim him back, but that day will never come. Carrot, the boxer is such a healthy and sweet little thing. Kinda remind me of Mr. Black that belongs to Serene. Except its a girl. Its a memorable time back in SPCA... guess will be doing it more often in the future.... sure is different doing it with someone else than alone thats for sure... hehe... sharing common interest is really important man!!!

This short trip has educated me once again... Dogs are life that equally important than any of us human. Will you keep your baby till they are like 5 years old and no longer cute and abandon them? Think hard before thinking about having a dog... its alot of commitments, and if you are really sure about having one... ADOPT ONE... they are all pretty dog that really yearns for a place to they can call home... Please BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO...woof woof

Entry with special guest, Ms Serene Chia... hahahaha

Unfairness.... BIG TIME!!!

Unfair incident #1
The most unfair things happened in class today... Late submission with no penalty imposed... wassup with that? I mean if they are going to get let off so easily just because of the blunder made by SCU side... then where goes the effort of those that hand in on time. What make those that submitted late so special, are the paying more then us? are they "white horses"? are they more good looking? I wonder....

Unfair incident #2
We had a toastmaster session today in class for communication lesson on presentation skills. everyone was suppose to talk for 2 mins infront of the class on a picked topic and pretty much just blabbering... No matter how unwilling we are, we all had to do it. But the strangest thing happened. This girl from China named Shu Ping was actually exempted, I mean whats with that, at first I thought to myself it could be the language barrier, but later thought that couldn't be as the lecture was conducted in English. Some of my mates even say she can speak (not perfect but ok) English. It so unfair why she can be excused while the rest have to take a chance. Izzit because she is from China she is paying the school more? or because they are holding the Olympics so they are a big deal (hahaha just sour grapes....BUT ITS UNFAIR!!!)

Anyway, all this is a bunch of bulls if u ask me... I cannot believe things can turn so ugly, but I honestly have very unhappy about everything that happened. Its like people getting away from crime unpunished... I cannot tolerate such nonsense, but can only voice out here as its my personal space. I know its kinda redundent, as i guess not many pple can do anything about it. But well, its not about doing anything about it... but more of a place to vent it out rather than holding it in... Its feels terrible.

Oh well... Good night to all and shall update more some other time... Cheers!

New blog changes...

Hey there... a new skin... a new tune... time to change things around here... hehez... Think its been a rocky 2008 thus far... Emotional and all... But pretty much picking up the pieces and now coming back to here. Guess it really doesn't pay to hold it in too much at time... Thank god i have a blog to allow me to blabber everything out...

Oh well today... its 7th month anniversary already... hehez... time really flies HAPPY ANNIVERSARY... in 3 days will be my sis's 7th year anniversary too... how coincedental. From today, I am on a mission. Coz 5 months from now I will need to change alot about myself. The bulk of my mission is to get into the shape I really want to... Seem to have lost focus after i attained my goal of getting featured in Men's Health. No more NATO (No Action Talk Only) I have prove to myself once, I believe i can do its again. here is how its been broken down.

1) Drop to my ideal weight of 72kg (am currently 76kg)
2) Drop the love handles PERMANENTLY
3) Featured in Men's Health again (different sections pehaps)

I can't see a better time to attain this then now given the time I have since I am still studying. Will attain it before my attachment and also a promise I made, that I have to keep. The future blog entires might be boring for some I guess... coz its pretty much gonna be a journal of my workout and all my feelings... perhaps some before and after pictures too... hehez...

Ultimately, its to keep trim and fit... I believe that is the best I can do for myself. I have seen my confidence coming with my regime... so I am hoping to find it back once again... and alot of support from all my friends is crucial.

Anyway, enjoy your day... and STAY FIT PPLE!!! cheers

What is dreams.... where are my directions????

This things seems to hit me in waves... and more so when I age... guess its for the fact that what lies ahead is still a blur... What do I want? what exactly do i want? Honestly I haven't the slightest clue. I choose to tell myself many things... I know it but I am still doing it... Which can be pretty sucky at times. I whine that I am caged, but m I really? or did i chose to be?

I should already count my blessings as life have been pretty kind to me thus far. Guess I have been pampered till this stage, so much so that I don't really know what it is like to fail, or get rejected, or fall. But yet i do not feel happy, more worried. The "what ifs" just keep attacking me from all directions. Why can't i get on with life, get a vision of how my future is going to be and work towards it? What is this inner fear that comes out more frequently to haunt me? So much so till a point i feel consumed in it already.

Many opportunities are coming my way now... yet what i look forward to initially has excuses formed within to reject them all. why am i like that... I really don't know. Have I lost the urgency of life? I really wonder.

"I don't know what I want", What exactly is dreams, what do I wish to achieve in life... Do guiding star exist... if so... where is mine? i wonder....

Expression on the Triple sharing room in NTU.... FARNIE LAH!!!

Voicing out indeed!!! hahaha cute lah...

Funny Clips....

Enjoy pple!!!

Poly Vs JC: thinkers?

Was just watching on TV the repeat telecast of BlogTv on CNA. Rather interesting the point of views they have. Some seems pretty sensible... while some seems crappy... hehe but does its mean that poly student are less a thinker as compared to JC student in today's context... please share ur view...

What the hell is wrong with me!!!

The heart is fill with discontentment... and unhappiness about myself... why me? This is crappy feeling... Just wan to hit something now... Muay Thai seems so much more interesting to me than class.... WHAT THE HELL WENT WRONG!!!!!!

MCP Vs Submissive Guys???

In the papers lately have been reports and views about guys carrying their girlfriend's handbag while out togther. A sissy act some say, while others think its the act of pampering you love one... what do u think? Male ego playing prankz... share your views....

Love Love Love???

Hello everyone... My new semester just kicked off 2 days ago... and already I am dreading it... hahaha not that i dread my classmate, but rather the new people in my class. The new batch, it is HORRID LAH! (at least for the monday class) All ah pek and ah soh, some even older enough to be my dad lah i feel...

Monday class was all about communication, indeed an important skill to acquire in all aspects of ur life, be it in your working life, social life, between friends, lovers, etc. Many things that the lecturer say is close to heart and when reflected do make alot of sense. Communication does resolve many issues, but not only through communication, but also the way u converse, the tone u use, and all plays a very deciding factor... I like this module... Hopefully can do fine for it....

The been 2 consecutive weeks of fun with my classmate, first was gathering at my place. Everyone had a good laugh and talk and makan. Got to know them so much better. After which was over at Serene place for majong and card games and all... That was till super late, very emo night, but most people had fun, which was most important i guess. Ultimately, I am really glad I got to know the rest of the class so much better.

I always feel that I have a barrier between me and some of my classmates, I wonder if its them? or just myself. But I am sure it can be resolve with so many class activities installed. Make me think of my poly days...

Talking about poly, one of my closest friend, Xin Yan have lost her battle against cancer and has left us on the 13 of feb 2008, age 23, a close friend during my poly time, very smart girl and a kai xin guo in our class... she will never be forgotten... MY GOOD FREN, Redang buddy. U will be remembered...

Many must be wondering what is with my headline... am I already facing problem with my relationship.. NO LAH... so dun worry k... Its just that many of the people around me are trapped by these 4 letter word. So it make me really wonder if this 4 letters is a bliss or a disaster. Being in it is blissful I guess, but losing it can make one feel like they have lost everything. The wonder of these word.... Some are worried about getting into it due to bad past of losing it last time. While others are just unwilling to let go of it.. Its so universal but yet have such great powers beyond explanation. Know I shouldn't be discussing this things, but it really got my attention. Its something that you have to experience it to understand the pain... am sure its like losing someone close, or worse, I know how that feels...

Anyway this word LOVE brings lots of happiness and sadness to many around the word. My conclusion as of now still remains as: It really depends how u define LOVE, when u truly understand this word then you know how to go about loving....

To end off... here is a nice song... sad song... but nice

Happy New Year ALL!!!!

Hi there all, as the Piggy is gone and here is the Rat, I hereby wish all Happy New Year!!!! Hope that everyone have many red packets from this beautiful year and had hearty feast of all the wonderful food (but do look after your waistline too lah)

Haven't been doing much today, basically just alot of work work and more work, yes i didn't do much visiting today. New year is just like any other day to me now.

Sorry but feeling a little emo at the moment... so nothing much to write, and I do not want to spoil your mood. So will just keep this entry short. GONG XI FA CAI!!!!!

Sickly end to Piggy year! WELCOME MY YEAR!!!

As everyone is busy with last min spring cleaning, or shopping for nice clothes to wear on the first day of the lunar new year... I am here recovering from a cough and a possible flu... hahaha seems like the "exercise-free" life is taking a toll on my health. Not forgetting the endless nights of assignments... hahaha its the last min mad rush season again!!!

First of all allow me to wish everyone a HAPPY AND PROSPEROUS LUNAR NEW YEAR!!!! heez... and congraz my classmate DAVID on the born of his second son on the 1st of Feb... all child born on the 1st is smart... (like me!!!!) hahahahahaha kidding lah... but he is so cute lah...

Assignments assignment then Exams exam... then its a week before this horrid month comes to an end... dry and a fast month man... and then there is few more to go... hehez...

Plenty of things left to do... haven't pack my old clothes, haven work out my diet plan, and the list goes on and on, but most importantly is to get well first. TOP PRIORITY!!! heez... without good health, alot of things cannot be done.

Anyway, just wish the coming year will be a blessed one... more oppotunities and all... Recession is likely to hit... so one word of advise.. PLEASE START SAVING!!! that is one of my key too... GONG XI FA CAI PPLE!!!! Win big money on the poker table and get lots of ang baoz!!! HUAT ARH!!!~!~!~!~

Clocked 109.595KM

Just made a simple calculation... I ran a total of 109.595km from last June 2007, This only includes all my events runs that i have participated, and not all the normal run i did... Woo hoo... that is alot lah... hehez... plenty more to come I am sure!!! heez

New Year Fresh Start!!!

Wah... Just realised I have not blog for close to a month... hahah even got difficulty coming into blogger just now... hehez... Been freaking busy with school, work and everything else under the sun...

Will give a one sentence summary of my current condition. I am BROKE, FAT and VERY BUSY!!! hahaha let me elaborate, BROKE means my pocket... haha my belt is at my tightest for the very first time for a very long time... Haha, I guess was that I have party too hard last year... making recuperation extra tough to go by... Furthermore, the peanuts pay that I am getting is not even enough to cover. Its like covering a VALLEY with a PEBBLE!!! heez...

Now to the FAT part, know I am going to get alot of scolding for these. But I AM INDEED GROWING FAT!!! Firstly, I have stop workout completely, don't ask me why, coz i cannot answer it myself. No motivation what so ever, though am still determine to get my dream body lah. Second, my diet is rather bad at the moment, lost control of portion control and have turn back to eating some of my comfort food last time. But I am not too worried about diet as I know the willpower to change is still there. Lastly, with the coming festival...OMG... i dun even dare to tink further... hehez... FAT FAT FAT!!! woo hoo!~!~!~

Now to BUSY, this semester is awfully short, and thou deadlines are not that short compare to last sem, the work load for each assignment have increase as the demand increases. MDIS adminstration side is still constantly giving us alot of crap... haiz... wonder if I really made the right choice... but there is really no turning back isn't it??? Assignments after assignments, then will be examz... AFTER CNY... like yah I am going to bring a book around with me to relative place to study... haha and when play card... OMG lose $$$ (due to shu = book) hahahaha

My months ahead am pretty much planned... If everything goes my way that is... Working towards a better and toner figure will be my top priority. I know i can go further... and its really up to me to prove myself right... Feeding my wallet fatter also, without neglecting my studies that is... 3 major things to juggle. Let see if i can handle it... JUST BRING IT!!!! COZ ITS MY YEAR!!!! Muahahahahaha

Alright then... enough for the new year... be sure to come often yah... hehez.. will be updating often again.. I promise... to many things to be writing liao.. just could not find the time... now can (taking abit of 'eat snake' time) heez... Alright, Back to work... take care guys.. and do catch up k... Cheers!!!

Look Hu's Back!!!

Hello People!!! its been a long time, I know, and i apologies for MIA-ing, its just that life have been so busy all of a sudden!!! School, work, and something new, LOVE!!! heez... for those that donno, yes I am in a relationship, nothing to hide, coz dun see the need to anymore. Sorry to all the ladies (or 'gentlemen') that have crushes on me out there, U will find better out there (Chey.... Like real like that arh!!! lolx)

Well, apart from school... its still more school, with that occasional work and all, I am not even going to mention anything about diet... COZ ITS JUST SCREWED!!! FOR THE FACT ITS DECEMBER!!! the month of many celebrations... FAT FAT FAT....

Now, school, this sem is worse then the last, as the topics are so much drier and the assignment seems to get more and more challenging. Been trying to work at a constant pace to prevent doing the same as last sem (last min hug buddha leg). But seems pretty inevitable with the last assignment submission, had to do an entire day marathon to settle it too, but glad i did make it.

After that, spent a nice weekend up north in KL for a study tour. VERY FUN LAH!!! hehez... would love to share pic but maybe next time... hehez.. busy at the moment.

Hmm... really cannot think of anything to add already coz all that is in my mind right now is assignment... so i better get to it already... Cheers pple!! HAPPY HOLIDAYZ!!!!

Suay day...

Its been a long long long long long long long long long long while since i last updated... had to spend sometime clearing of the 'web' before coming in here (get it... world wide web... yah?? nvm). Well... cannot really recall exactly what happened in details so will just recap the key events that have happened in these few weeks, in a random order (whatever that have come to my mind first).

Hmm...first of all, Congraz to the Auschamp for clinching both Gold and Sliver spot for the Expat race these year in the Regatta 2007!!! U guys rox and totally kicked ass out there. Was so raring to race only to find out that it clashes with my exams... but u guys do well without me, nevertheless, as arnie (mayor of califonia) will say: "I WILL BE BACK" hahaha.

Exam for semester one is done and over with. Just glad that its over, thou not too sure that i will do as well. But still glad that its over. Just started off my new sem yesterday, yes, just one week break, which was over even before I can blink my eye for this case. But the week was well spent on earning some quick bucks and spending quality resting time. All the way for this sem then, 1 down 5 to go!!!

Last week was working for an event called the "Morgan Stanley Summit", all the big shots were there, CEOs, COOs, all the rich pple... haha but cannot be bothered coz working hours have been crazy. dog tired after the few days, but got to know more people and made more friends, both local and international. so its was not too bad afterall.

Last friday marks laoshi's (aka Mr. Luk) last performance as he stepped down as conductor and offically retires from the music scene, it was an emotional sight as buckets of tears were pouring from many people's eyes, mine included. The only reason why I stayed on was for him, he is definately a great teacher and not only though us how to interpret music, he also teaches us alot about life. Its a pity to be losing him, but well, I guess everyone deserve a break at one point of time. He was a mentor, a fren, and even almost like a grand dad to me. Lao shi, thank you...

Enough on that before i get all emotional again.... Today have got to be the most unlucky day of this year yet... Got my friend to come look at my computer today, was tinking must be problem with my C: as I was using it halfway before it overloads and restarted itself yesterday. But today, was given the most shocking news ever.... MY HARDDISK CRASHED!!! and nothing can be recovered from within... my heart shattered thinking the amount of things I have inside, all my pictures, my songs, my memories... OMG.... the feeling is like when my ipod died but many times worse... What made matter worse was that thats not the only thing that need to be fixed, my wallet and watch is also spoil and need to be sent for repaired... $$$ can u please drop from the sky please!!!!! later going down to braun buffel to get my wallet check. before going down to muay thai to let off some steam and burn some calories.

Talking about steam, or anger rather, brought me to this topic. What's wrong with being a Free Lancer? I know alot of people out there have this misconception that free lancers have all the time in the world, equvialent to a bum, only that we are getting pay. I am telling you, that is not true, some free lancers (like myself) so happen to be more busy then ur regular 8-5 jobs, we work under more den one boss and sometime while u guys are already slping in ur comfortable bed, we are still working as our bosses is from the other side of the globe. The only advantage as freelancers is yes, we do have our freedom in time, however, that is also possible only with good time management. So please think twice before u tink of venting ur anger on free lancers next time. They are not as free as you think they are. Blame it on ur bad time management skills alright...

What inspired me to say that was just from a situation that was not suppose to be one in the first place... but well just need a place to vent it out. Anyway thats all I have for now, 2 weeks before stand chart... alot of work to do... and honestly i can say i am not ready, but just doing it nevertheless. Wish me good luck den.

Cheers peepz!!!

A day have past....

After an entire day, thou have been busy at work and all, its have never got my mind off the matter, however, I managed to sort and clear things up quite abit. Though I am still in the process of slowly picking myself up... this process is made faster as there is someone waiting at the end of the line for me. Its no longer about myself now.

Will improve myself to improve us.... cheers!!!

What Use have I???

What do you want Ryan??? This question have been going through me... for the moment I open my eyes... its was with me before i close my eyes yesterday... and today, wishing it will go away... it didn't...

What give me the right to hurt others? I didn't mean to... that's just an excuse I am using currently I feel... Whats my fear? I don't know. I just know that I am a F**King bad guy... I dun deserve anyone to be in my life... Its nobody's fault that I feel this way about myself. The problem with my upbringing? Have I been too "pampered" and "over sheltered" to even take this kinda thing? Worse is when I know I am at fault, yet you have to come console me, what use have I?

Life is really screwed for me now, my diet is screwed, order in life is screwed, and the realization of my own character is screwed have really brought be to rock bottom... I need time to sort it out, will you be there to wait for me? or what.... i wonder?

I am a great pretender, thats for sure, my strong front deceives even those that are hypersensitive people. Outer shell, I am this strong, witty, happy person, how i wish I am like this in the core too.. but guess what, inside its empty. I am just an empty shell...

I contradict alot of my own words, I realised it. I remember I say I do not feel sorry about myself, and yet I am here saying what a LOSER in life I am (and its true, I am). But I am sure I will not stay a loser, its just takes time for me to see the light and pick myself up again.

I am sorry to you, for causing u to be in so much pain and suffering. My existence turned u into a liar, something I am sure you never was. I seem like nothing but bad company, and yet u are still ever so understanding, saying its ok and all.

What initially was pain inflicted by me to u, ended in u having to console me despite the one being hurt is you. What use have I? I say to myself... At this point of time... even I despised myself. Ryan is a coward, a useless Bum, a NATO (No Action Talk Only) ass.

Bottomline is... I am sorry... I am.... I really am....

Funny... and very innovative!!! hahaha

Enjoy!!!