End of one... start of next.... Monday, October 05, 2009
Back... 2 weeks of back to back training has taken a toll on my body.... still lack both strength and stamina.... we all know what that means... MORE TRAINING!~!~! HARDER TRAINING.... am going to try put myself through the original 16 weeks training all over again. probably will do so after my current one is up... am at week 15 for this one. Significant change to my body... cannot be the judge coz well i have been looking myself at all time... and as usual, THERE IS ROOM FOR IMPROVEMENT. Discipline is still not there... diet is still really screwed... :( Need to do something about it... and fast...
This weekend, Sava Sprints, well not very confident that we can win anything, but hey, good warm up for the November one. which I am really really keen to repeat my glory, my gold medal need some company. There is only one way around it... make A boat, and how, good time trials... JIA YOU!~!~!~
Starting to like OC, but the distance still killing me. Oh yah, my shades snapped... Freaking hell a week before the race... and i always have difficulty finding a pair that suits my face, and so when there is so many things already on my to buy list... OMG!~!~!~ hahaha tink will source for cheaper alternative liao... Currently items that I will likely be buying over the coming months will be:
A pair of runners (Newton or Asiscs)
A pair of running tights (long)
A long sleeve compression top (optional- can wait)
A Bag
now A pair of shades...
MONEY MONEY COME!~!~! hahaha
Not to mention the many clothes that caught my eyes... HAHAHA i guess i haven't been shopping for a long time... so many things seems to be appealing to me... HAHA hopefully I can work myself into a good shape to look good in them. HAHAHA
Apart from dragonboat racing, there is the number of up coming runs.. (FUN FUN FUN) First up would be Nike run, follow by NB run, then will be Run for Hope and then the fun walk... still recruit more pple to do so... so yeah... its all for a good cause... Likely going for the 100km one... not sure am going to survive, sure will try... hahah good way to end off the year... hehe
Alright lah... off to watch TV liao... NITES ALL... sorry if I have neglected anyone due to my regime... need to get some discipline back in life... and also in my diet... pray for me... i can use all the prayers i can get... HAHAHA
OOSSHHH....
My life today.
9:55 PM
Quick Entry.... Siong Weekend... Monday, September 28, 2009
Thought I just drop by before heading of to watch Criminal Mind... Monday ain't exactly blue for me... but things went pretty smoothly for me I should think. Just need to get my logistics cleared... and more planning and I am more or less set. Hate last min amendments, but that's how things runs i suppose.... its never a smooth ride... hehe.
Enough about work, now toOoOOOooo..... Training HAHAHA well nothing much to write about it... just that it is SIONG liao..which i like... hahah abit sadist but I still feel its not up there yet... not when we are only 2 weeks from the race... I got the feeling there are pple in the boat with the "I am new, so i can slack and give up mentality" abit sian when kana such a thing... but yeah... what to do... things really did change over the years... only thing i can do is to instill discipline in myself and hopefully influence the rest to do so too... 2 weeks from race.... normally by now there will be a drive and urge that medals are near... this time... NOTHING... dun even think we can qualify if you ask me... haiz... praying for the best and hopefully enjoy a good race... thats all i can ask for... Well probably because so many regulars are not rowing... and I am not even close to the rest of them... RYAN you really need to learn to be more chill and socialble.... JIAYOU
Sunday was the ultimate killer.... almost fainted out at sea... Word of advise for those that is planning to do OC after DB... HAVE LUNCH!~!~! its better to puke than to starve... that for sure... shall not go into details but have never yearn to return from training so much for the first time... shall work our something different this coming week. Alright lah... nothing much to share liao... shall not bore you with my training story anymore... 3 weeks to end my first set of regime... 2 weeks to the races.... OOOSSSHHHH jia you!~!~1
My life today.
11:09 PM
Finally... Wednesday, September 23, 2009
Just realised its been really really long since I have entered an entry.... Tot I scribble something before it start to develop cob "web" (get it... haha... okok bad joke) Anyway, for those that don't know, I have already started work, slightly over 2 months already, closing the end of my probation period. Intention of leaving, but yet, weighing things out at the present situation and still stuck in the middle. Don't get me wrong, its not that the job is not fun or anything, just that its not the line i intend to stay for long, eventually would still love to enter the great world of the hospitality line. All the rotating shift, smiles of customers, complaints... *sniff* arh.... I can smell them already.
Anyway about life, nothing much to talk about actually, pretty much lost much of it ever since I left school. Its true that the best time of your life are really spent in school. Frens, endless gossips and complaining together, rushing assignments to the wee hours of the morning just to meet impossible deadlines. Maybe abit sadist, but I do miss and would love to go back to that again someday... Convocation has been confirmed. Its going to be on the 30th October 2009 at Hilton Hotel. Didn't ask my parents to come, partly felt its abit ex for them to come see me recieve a cert, which i rather used the money for a nice family portrait. Guess I will be alone then. So Frens if you wish to come support. PLEASE DO DROP BY!~!~ hahaha
Have been feeling moody since Monday, thou its been a public holiday, we get to rest and all that, i kinda prefer to work as it keeps my mind occupied and dun allow it to stray to 'other' things. Well many might think its over for so long liao... why am I still brooding over it. The only answer is, if it is so easy, it will not be called love. HAHAHA damn chim right...
I guess I am feeling it a little bit more because... well... this friday will supposedly be our anniversary, 2nd year to be exact. The same day 2 days ago, I embark on a new journey, and then again 2 years later, things have pretty much gone back to how I was long long time ago, the only difference is a scar that still occasionally bleeds from time to time. Thinking back on all that have went past these 2 years, is both sweet yet kinda painful... but never once have I thought this is how love felt like. A friend once shared with me, Break ups are like climbing a monkey bar, you have to learn to let go in order to move on. I understand that quote, but accepting it is an entirely different matter. Till today, I still do not have the courage to do alot of things, I know this is a battle with myself, coz only I can decide when to move on and all. I also realised its a Heart vs Mind thing again, like back then when i tried to lose weight, thats why I have been keenly working out, training up my mind to take control once again.
Giving up has never been through my mind, in all the things I have done in my life. But when force to do so... you just feel really really helpless I suppose. After not blogging for so long, I almost forget that this is one avenue that I can still release the pressure within when I have no one to turn to (or rather dun wish to bore my fren with all this bullsh*t anymore).
Like mentioned, I still lack courage in many many things, and all this lingers... and is really tying me down, when will i ever take action on them? I guess I will never know, but another thing i used to conqure myself would be that, the other party will not know the suffering I am going through, its not much that I wish for her to know in the first place, I rather suffer alone, dun hurt my family, my frens, and all that care about me. I have learn to put on a mask for the first time in my life, for such matters.
Comparing to others, I guess I am fortunate, as I get to tasted what it is like to be loved and to love. Well, it really does things to you I guess. But I will consider it as one of the hardest fall I have ever took in life by far. I deserve to pad myself in the back coz, yes I am indeed numbing myself by flooding my brains, but at least I do not hurt my body, I train it to be stronger.
Without realising it, I have already typed out so much feeling, pouring out is always good, feels slightly lighter. KTV visit dun even seem the same anymore, pehaps now I can sing with more feeling... HAHAHA shall test it out the next time.
Well enough about that, hmm... apart from that has been working my ass off to attain the figure i wish to get, there is alot of work still left to be done, and I am already into the final month of my 16 weeks regime. Gymming is tiring but I always feel good after "surviving" the routine. But I must say, its taking away alot of my social life. I will also take this opportunity to apologies to all my friends out there that I have fly plane these few months. I dislike the me now thats why I am improving myself, but changing myself physically has a price to pay i suppose. All my friends are important to me. I promise to change and manage my time better. PLEASE GIVE ME A SECOND CHANCE.
Guess thats what I have for now, enough for all the months of not blogging for now i suppose. Promise I will not make all of you wait that long for the next entry, will blog more regularly. Time to get myself a good camera so that I can post pictures on the blog too... HEHE will be posted soon, for now... good night, sweet dreams, sleep tight..... *sore throat*....
My life today.
10:37 PM
Ten Rules for Being Human by Cherie Carter-Scott Friday, July 24, 2009
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| 1. | You will receive a body. You may like it or hate it, but it's yours to keep for the entire period. |
| 2. | You will learn lessons. You are enrolled in a full-time informal school called, "life." |
| 3. | There are no mistakes, only lessons. Growth is a process of trial, error, and experimentation. The "failed" experiments are as much a part of the process as the experiments that ultimately "work." |
| 4. | Lessons are repeated until they are learned. A lesson will be presented to you in various forms until you have learned it. When you have learned it, you can go on to the next lesson. |
| 5. | Learning lessons does not end. There's no part of life that doesn't contain its lessons. If you're alive, that means there are still lessons to be learned. |
| 6. | "There" is no better a place than "here." When your "there" has become a "here", you will simply obtain another "there" that will again look better than "here." |
| 7. | Other people are merely mirrors of you. You cannot love or hate something about another person unless it reflects to you something you love or hate about yourself. |
| 8. | What you make of your life is up to you. You have all the tools and resources you need. What you do with them is up to you. The choice is yours. |
| 9. | Your answers lie within you. The answers to life's questions lie within you. All you need to do is look, listen, and trust. |
| 10. | You will forget all this. |
My life today.
11:01 PM
Great Trip.... Great Memories.... Saturday, June 20, 2009
Just found a block of time before I head out for band prac, yah, you heard be correctly... band prac... hahaha been trying to find time to do so... finally have sometime (in fact, lots of it now) hahaha...
Today's blog will be on my trip to KL, a very enjoyable overseas trip. Got to know very friendly people, Claudy and Chris... and of course, a new and cute friend... BULLET will let pictures do most of the talking... This was the Labour Day weekend... its truely very fun, which now thinking back still brings lots of smile one my face...
This is taken while meeting Serene at Tanah Merah, waiting for the train to the airport... never fail to have a nice post and glam smile for the camera... hee
This was on the plane, taken while we took out our Strategic Management books to read, yes I know its holiday, but at that point of time, both of us just couldn't stand assignment piling up.. so in order to enjoy the trip, we have to make use of whatever spare time we have to read...read... ReAD!~!~! hahaha
This is the first stop... haha the very mission we go to neighbouring country for... haha and of course its ice cream waffle is fantastic, thou the person got the flavor wrong... but its still taste good coz its A&W!~!~!~ haha
And introducing... this is the new fren we made while we are over there... his name is Bullet... haha adorable little thing with endless amount of energy... haha when he pants it seems like he is smiling... its Cute lah... hehe
And this are the wonderful people that hosted us during our short trip, claudy on the left and chris on the right... Thank alot guys... really had loads of fun during the trip...
As much as going overseas might be fun, its equally important who you go with... if you go with someone that you dun enjoy with... be it Paris or Maldives the trip will be meaningless. But traveling with the person u love... and enjoy being with... even sentosa or a trip to the zoo seems like endless fun.... I am glad I had this opportunity and chance to experience this...
So this is the blog for now... will see if there is more wonderful to share soon... cheers!~!~
My life today.
1:19 PM
New chapter... Friday, June 05, 2009
I am officially an undergrad... (that is if nothing goes wrong in my final semester). My final paper for this entire course ended on Monday, and I am now kinda trying to adapt to life without having to rush for assignment, attending night classes, and returning home close to midnight. Not that any of that matters, its kinda sadist, but I actually enjoyed those moments, becoz attending class allow me to meet my wonderful classmates, the crazy bunch of people that endure through this 2 years with me. We never fail to smile and joke about the things we learn and also share pointer. Yes, some politics is inevitable, but nothing major really did blew up... which is kinda nice...
Remember 2 years back, when I was lost, searching for a course to enroll in, and walking into orientation feeling the beginning of this entire thing... and now, looking back, those are really wonderful wonderful memories. I get the feedback from alot of people, who are really puzzled when I told them that I am from a part time class, coz my class is really united despite their own work committments. What I gain from this 2 years is definately more than what I have bargained for.
I came with nothing, but left with plenty of friends, knowledge, and a bulging tummy !~!~ hahaha well that can be worked on now that i have all the time in the world. I am FREE MAN!~!~ woo hoo!~!~
My life today.
12:12 PM
Final Run Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Counting down and its approximately one month left for this much dreaded course to be over, never knew what an easy life I have been leading right up to now... Not complaining, and guess many out there will be saying i am just looking at the tip of an ice berg, i agree with everyone who thinks that way, what lies ahead is much greater and challenging... Am I up to it? I start to wonder...
"Who are u to wait for jobs to look for you?" these words echo in me, and have been imprinted in me, yes i admit that I have been so fortunate to be meeting people that can get me job so far in life, but guess that have put me in a wrong state of mind thinking that the "Shou zhu dai tu" (wait under the tree for the rabbit to come out in chinese) method really works. Glad to be pulled back to reality, hit hard, but will pick up. Its like falling down in a run, when u are comfortable, sometime u forget how painful it is to fall, but a sudden fall will make u realise and be more careful and focus i guess. What a metaphor huh? hee
So many activities lies ahead, but all that have been flooding my brains are Strategic Management, Food Service Operations, Facilities & Risk Management... am sure i am not alone in this, kudos to those that have to work and do work at the same time. I kowtow to all of you. I look forward to the long break after. maybe go to a place where i know no one... and just find peace again?
I am inferior, I am jobless, I am not as fit as i used to be, I am nothing... i stop working for myself already, which pretty much lose the meaning of working, so what am i working for? I really dono... to compete? to stay competitive amids a very strong competitor, or just to show i can hold my line as well and protect the things I love? I wonder... I hate myself for doubting myself, for the lack of flare, for lack of proactiveness. I hate myself for being scared of everything, thinking that i will fail before i try, know that i will not fail if someone gives me a change to prove myself and yet not seeking hard enough for that someone to give me that chance.
What makes you tink you are better then everyone else? who are you? when are you going to wake up and realise that u are not the king of the world... in this vast world.... you are a nobody... nobody...
My life today.
1:01 PM
